If I were a Superhero

If I were a Superhero, my superpower would be Creativity, and I would light the world with Beauty.

I would call people back to Eden and remind them that when God creates, he crowns his work with approval by calling it Good.

If I were a Superhero, I would create Beautiful Things.

With my words, I would shape stories into blazing torches of Hope.

With my camera, I would freeze beauty and joy into pixels and share them for a smile.

With my hands I would

paint 

sketch 

sew

crochet 

cook and clean-

All in the knowledge that when I create, I am following in God's footsteps.

I would labor over endless loads of laundry and and clear those dirty dishes from the table - AGAIN -knowing that this is holy work - restoring order where there once was chaos. I would return things to the way they ought to be.

My nickname would be Redeemer.

My nemesis- my Accuser, if you will - would be an archer, and his arrows would bring the sting of frustration, inadequacy, and despair. 

He would scoff at my every move, and assault my mind with endless accusations. 

He would critique my inconsistencies, and call my character into question. 

He would belittle my inability to stick with any one thing, and criticize all I put my hand to.

His assault would be relentless, and his aim would be to strip away my Voice.

I am not a superhero, but I do struggle with Not Being Consistent.

I love creativity, but it seems to be a double-edged sword- a blessing and a curse. It is one of my greatest joys, and one of my deepest frustrations. I am like a short stack of dynamite, with passions that quickly burst and fade into an equally intense passion for Something Else.

Sometimes I wish I were a candle, with one gift - one long standing desire that would slowly burn over a lifetime. I imagine I would be a lot more effective if I were to pour myself and all my energies into one effort. 

Like just writing on this blog.

Or only doing photography.

Or starting an Etsy shop to sell my cutesy creations.

Or writing music and cutting an album with friends.

Or traveling and teaching people about how amazing God is.

Just one thing- pick one. I have done them all, at one time or another.

Well, I started to, anyway...

I guess what I'm wondering is this:

Is it possible to bridle creativity?

In some ways, I imagine I am a wild horse that needs to be tamed. Wouldn't a tame horse be more useful to God? Or does He use my short-burning passions for something useful anyways?

At any rate, I'm hoping to cultivate contentment on the way to my answer.

Until then, I rest in Psalm 139- Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.

God sees me and I'll bet He has more patience for me than I have for myself.

That's an oddly reassuring thought...