Maybe you knew this already, but just in case you didn't know (in a whisper voice) I'm not perfect.

Congratulations! You're not perfect! It's ridiculous to want to beperfect anyway. But then, everybody's ridiculous sometimes, exceptperfect people. You know what perfect is? Perfect is not eating ordrinking or talking or moving a muscle or making even the teensiestmistake. Perfect is never doing anything wrong - which means neverdoing anything at all. Perfect is boring! So you're not perfect!Wonderful! Have fun! Eat things that give you bad breath! Trip overyour own shoelaces! Laugh! Let somebody else laugh at you! Perfectpeople never do any of those things. All they do is sit around and sipweak tea and think about how perfect they are. But they're really notone-hundred-percent perfect anyway. You should see them when they getthe hiccups! Phooey! Who needs 'em? You can drink pickle juice andimitate gorillas and do silly dances and sing stupid songs and wearfunny hats and be as imperfect as you please and still be a goodperson. Good people are hard to find nowadays. And they're a lot morefun than perfect people any day of the week.

~Stephen Manes, Be a Perfect Person in Just Three Days!